21 May 2004.
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Everyone's favourite tipple Lisa has it right: the studies of the Social Research Issues Centre are both exhaustive and hilarious. Alright, so most of the laughing in Kate Fox's Passport to the Pub is done at the fate of hapless tourists:
"Research findings: In observation-studies, we timed first-time tourists to find out exactly how long it would take them to discover the no-waiter-service rule. The fastest time - just under two-and-a-half minutes - was achieved by a sharp-eyed American couple. The slowest – over 45 minutes – involved a group of six young Italians. This group did not, however, seem particularly concerned about the apparent lack of service, being engrossed in a lively debate about football. Sympathy should go to the French couple who marched out of the pub, complaining bitterly to each other about the poor service and British manners in general, after a 24-minute wait."
And
Don’t ever introduce yourself. The “Hi, I’m Chuck from Alabama” approach does not go down well in British pubs. Natives will cringe and squirm with embarrassment at such brashness. If your introduction is accompanied by a beaming smile and outstretched hand, they will probably find an excuse to get away from you as quickly as possible. Sorry, but that’s how it is. The British quite frankly do not want to know your name, or shake your hand – or at least not until a proper degree of mutual interest has been well established (like maybe when you marry their daughter). You will have to adopt a more subtle, less demonstrative approach.
I didn't realise that observing tourists in pubs could be a job. For the rest of us, it's just a hobby. She also doesn't have it wrong with this one:
"The bar counter in a pub is possibly the only site in the British Isles in which friendly conversation with strangers is considered entirely appropriate and normal behaviour."
Makes me proper homesick, it does. I wonder if they'll translate her book into Catalan? And in the meantime, do you think someone should forward the pub advice on to the newly-Londoned Cory before he dies of thirst?
20 May 2004.
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Things that are good to see:
Pupil power.
Freedom of speech - MM really ought to do that interview. (Although I suspect that his contracts with the distributors will legally prevent this. Ah well, maybe next time.)
An end to fractions.
The importance of things when you have nothing to do.
Some things are at least as they should be in this world.
16 May 2004.
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11 May 2004.
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AP reports:
Sales of goods at dollar stores "are suspended until further notice," announcers on [Cuban] state television announced, reading an 'official notice'. Crucially, food and personal hygiene products were exempted.
Cuba blamed the measure on "the brutal and cruel" measures adopted last week by President Bush to strengthen the embargo of Cuba and to hasten the end of the communist government here.
This is big news for the Cubans. The dollar shops are a vital source of scarce resources for everyone who can get their hands on greenbacks (by any means necessary).
It seems unlikely that the Bush measures forced them into this; more likely countering in almost the only way they can, while forcing people to go back to the original Cuban peso (rather than the Cuban dollar peso, called peso convertible). But such posturing isn't good for anyone.
I wrote an article for the Big Issue about the proliferation of dollar shops I witnessed when in Cuba six months ago, which is online here.
More information on the currencies themselves here. As a side point, Cuba is the only country I've ever been to that has both a note and a coin (both featuring Che) in a denomination of 3.
05 May 2004.
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As John at BarcaBlog reports, The Barcelona Forum of Cultures will be searching bags for rogue food and drink so that they can then force you to spend between €15 and €25 on one of their 'set menus'. That's not cheap, either - a set menu in the centre of town is typically €8 - €10 (and often less).
Bottled water - this from an event that has Nestle, who make bottled water, among the sponsors - will be €1 each. Entry tickets, by the way, cost €21 per day, not including entry to the dialogues.
Not surprisingly, a lot of people aren't too impressed by the event thus far, which seems to have gone out of its way to really annoy locals but really impress the corporate sponsors.
I had an article about it in the Big Issue in the North this week that's online here. The event kicks off next week, so we'll see if anything gets worse, better - or if anyone even cares - then.
05 May 2004.
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I seem to have received a whole string of future back-cover quotes from a single blog entry.
"His story checks out" -- 3AM magazine blog
"More websites to his name than Imelda Marcos had shoes" -- 3AM magazine blog
"I wish I was called Andrew Losowsky" -- 3AM magazine blog
04 May 2004.
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Unlike Ben, I rather like the idea that Petrach's head is not his own. It lends more weight to the theory that a billionaire has been slowly collecting the skulls of all famous writers and thinkers, and is currently in the latter stages of a reanimation project.
Sorry, I digressed there. Anyway, think less on that and more on the wonders of Eric Langert's Animal Park, as revealed by The Deep North, which is currently even further North than usual.
03 May 2004.
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I'd missed this one, but The Modern World's March newsletter mentions in passing that reclusive, uber-talented author Thomas Pynchon has appeared on television. Pynchon, a man so secretive that a chapter in Don Foster's book is dedicated to people claiming to be him, has never been successfully tracked down by press, academics or stalkers. No-one knows what he looks like, where he lives or, really, who he is.
Which is fair enough, if he wants it that way. But there remains a single cameo that could tempt the most ascetic of hermits out of their caves. I speak, of course, of The Simpsons.
The momentous event is reported here, was narrowly missed by this gentleman here and can be viewed here.
02 May 2004.
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I've been playing around with a printer, one of my Cuba photos, 28 sheets of A4, the huge white walls in my bedroom and the unfortunately-named but SFW Rasturbator - the cheap way of decorating a room with style (although I'm still itching to get at those Polish Posters. Be still my credit card).
Form an orderly queue for private viewings, please. Ladies first.
02 May 2004.
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If ever one wanted evidence of the legacy Hammersley and co have left on the tech world in London, it's here. Seeing a disturbing lack of evidence of bloodshots, though.
01 May 2004.
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As wise NED Richards (right arm, underarm) points out, cricket stats are mighty (hmm, reminds of something I wrote once).
Other stats worthy of note include the first class batting average of Samuel Beckett (8.75 in two games for Dublin University vs Northamptonshire; no matter, bat again, bat better) and this gem:
WG Grace ct Storer b Conan-Doyle 110.
Sir Arthur's only first class wicket, caught by the Wisden Cricketer of the Year 1899. And not a bad scalp to claim.
Apparently he wrote a poem, "Reminiscence of Cricket", about it. Anyone got a copy?
01 May 2004.
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On balance, it's probably good to see the British Library purchasing the entire archives of Punch magazine. There's some gold to be panned from the upper-class streams of conciousness, if a wise editor is put in charge.
It would be even better if said editor pushed to remove the archives from this clumsy pay-for site and placed in this illuminating (and far more valuable) den of loveliness. Either way, Britishness is well worth archiving before it becomes a historical category of its own.